Monday, December 20, 2010

Annual Update Letter, December 2010

“What is late?” I looked blankly at Kate, opened my mouth, but shut it again once I calculated that any answer I’d give her would only spur on other questions…and we were running (yes) late. Kate is big time into questions. In fact, Greg made a “question box” for the girls, with the idea that we’d answer some of them from time to time (though we’ve forgotten to) so I looked through it the other day. Here is a sampling of Kate’s questions (Elia had none by the way):
--How do you make somebody stop when they don’t even know what words mean?
--Why when you go somewhere you have to leave your bed and your house?
--Why does George not want to go in the bath? (Curious George??)
--How do seasons know how to change?
--Why are some pictures so small?
–Why do bananas change from green to yellow?
--How do we know if God was born because he made everything?

Yes. This is my life.

Kate is doing well, and is enjoying Kindergarten. She’s going to Zeeland Christian’s Spanish immersion program (with the idea that she’ll be bi-lingual by 6th grade). I am still able to help her with her homework, so that’s good. She has grown in confidence over the past year, which has been fun to see. She’s thoughtful, caring, considerate, and inquisitive.

Elia is 3 1/2, and there was a time we weren’t sure she’d make it to 4. (Ha, I told that joke last year about 2 1/2.) She has really come a long way in terms of maturity, and (not) lying on the children I babysit, but she’s still working on her listening skills. Elia is out-going, LOVES to dance, make up songs/words/characters, and, when I look at her hands, is still my little baby (which is one of her characters, by the way). The phrase she probably says the most is, “You shouldn’t’ do that…you’re making me sad.” (She takes it quite personally when she’s told—even in passing—that she shouldn’t do something.) My most used phrase with her is, “Elia, T-Bone, Shakira—whoever you are, you need to listen to me.” My challenge lies in the fact that, in spite of the “Parenting With Love and Logic” class I took last summer, my favorite parenting style is the rewards system (aka bribery). This tactic worked wonders with Kate.
Elia, however, wants for nothing—she couldn’t even name one thing she wanted for Christmas. A good trait to have, but a completely foreign concept for me. She keeps us entertained, laughing, and frustrated.

Greg is crazy. He’s presently taking 2 Biology classes (on-line from MSU) to gain credits and to explore his old love of science. These classes, combined with his teaching load, grading, and job as Department Head, have been quite challenging. The good news is he’s smarter than I ever knew! (And I thought he was relatively smart to begin with!) He has given up coaching all things this year to free time up for these other pursuits. Greg surprised me the other week with a professional massage, over-night babysitting, and dinner and a movie. He’s now legendary among wives everywhere (which is only a small part of why he did it). Greg is loving, intelligent, terribly hard working, and, still, often running late.

The four of us (me, Greg and the girls) drove out to Denver for Spring break where we reunited with Greg’s immediate (and some extended) family. The 18 hr drive went better than we’d expected (granted we drove through the night), however the drive home was somewhat “soiled” (pardon my pun) due to Elia’s sudden flu. But it was a great trip nonetheless. Greg and I also flew to LA last summer for a week, and stayed with his brother Kurt, visited friends, and enjoyed the child-free life!

I know I keep saying “next year I hope to find a full time job…” but this time I think I mean it. I am staying home this year (since Elia is still home full time, and Kate needs to be driven everyday to school), which is going really well. Every year gets better it seems, I bet by the time they’re both in school I’ll be lovin’ it! I babysit 4 days a week (a 6 month old girl 2 days, and a 1 1/2 yr old boy 2 days), and I clean 3 houses and a business. I feel like my plate is full, but not overly full (I can eat a lot) so that’s good. I’m just now starting to believe what women have been telling me all this time—that these years go by quickly.

Last Christmas a friend of ours mentioned to Greg that they were going to take a year off of buying anything (besides the basics). Greg was so impressed with the idea that he told me all about it. I got to thinking that if I were to do that, I’d have to stock up on a lot of things first…which spurred a buying spree that has only just now stopped…not exactly what Greg was going for, but our house looks fantastic!

Today, as Kate held the baby I watch, she said, “Yes Keira, you’re so sweet and sit so still—not at all like Avery!” Avery is a Nieuwsma not only legally (as of July 20th), but in all ways (she even looks like Meredith—and Kate and Elia.) She started walking at 8 months and hasn’t stopped since. I’ve heard her latest hobby is moving a stool around so she can get into higher, naughtier things.
She’s adorable! Though she looks at me like I’m a crazy woman; I’m guessing it’s because she doesn’t know me as well as her Mom, Dad, and Grandmas (who each babysit weekly). She keeps Josh and Meredith moving, laughing, and loving beyond compare.

If you’ll take a look at the picture of the 3 girls (which, why wouldn’t you at least glance at it?) this gem was taken between Elia accidentally strangling Avery, and Avery squirming off the couch. Avery is 14 months old now and starting to talk. Josh and Mere think she’s the most amazing person in the world, and who can blame them?? (Full disclosure, Meredith wrote this part.) Josh and Mere have relaxed considerably as all seasoned parents eventually do. It no longer takes both of them to change her diaper, baby things have taken over their house, and as far as I know, they only take Avery’s temperature when she feels hot.

Josh is doing an internship in the counseling department at Aquinas College. He is in the final year of a master’s degree program in Counseling Psychology at Spring Arbor University. Josh will graduate in May and hopes to go into private practice. Meredith is still working at the Reformed Church in America. This year her title is Interim Data Manager. She’s been asked to take a broad look at how the denomination uses data and make recommendations on how to improve on it. She’s not traveling as much, for which she’s thankful because she misses Avery like crazy when she’s gone. All told, Josh and Mere have managed to go on four dates this year. They’re hoping for a few more in years to come, but find it hard to leave Avery behind when they go, and are so worn out by the end of the week that they almost prefer staying in and going to bed early instead.

Mom mentioned (in passing of course) that she and Dad were leaving Christmas day on a trip. When I asked Dad about it further on a drive to KFC, he said they were first flying into Virginia to visit Mom’s brother Tim, then he’d planned a surprise trip (with in driving distance) to celebrate their 40th anniversary (December 29th). He said he couldn’t tell me where, because I can’t keep a secret…however, by the end of our short drive home, I knew all the details. Hmmm. I wonder where I get my secret-keeping abilities. (Or was it more my persuasive skills? Either way, I win!)

Dad traveled with a friend to Myanmar in February for two weeks to speak at the graduation ceremonies of the Reformed Theological College of Myanmar, and do a workshop with the pastors and students there. For the past few years he has been part of a group that raises support for theological education there.

Mom has dedicated one day a week to babysitting Avery, and every other Thursday she comes to my house to watch Kate and Elia so I can clean a house. She is still in charge of the Kid’s Hope mentoring program at their church, teaches Sunday school, VBS, and is a GEMS leader. It’s amazing how much work you can finally do when you retire! As many of your already know, (because you contributed!) I made a memories book for Mom to celebrate her 60th Birthday in August. We surprised her with it and read our contributions in the book, and she cried right on cue! Later she said it was the best present she could have gotten, which is good, cause it was either that or a surprise trip to Ireland.

Last summer we all went to Iowa to join about 80 other people from age 1-64 for a Nieuwsma reunion (Yes, it was us, if you heard a racket one weekend in August). It was so good to visit and re-connect! It has been a year since my dad’s brother died, and two weeks before the reunion my cousin (21 year old Brandon Oldenkamp) died in a climb in the Grand Tetons. There is nothing one can say (or fathom) in these things, but I have been impressed by the grace of God and faith of my dad’s family. What are the odds that a family with ten kids would all raise families who love God? It is comforting to be a part of this family (and the Dykstras, Schempers, Walcotts, and VanZomerens!) We have been blessed.

Well, this is one more thing I can cross off my list; hope this letter finds you well. While we (some of us more than others) are not very good at keeping up with family and friends, our love and admiration for you all is definitely there—I feel surrounded by a blanket of love from people I’ve known from all different times in my life. I’ve always said I may not have been blessed with tons of money, but I’ve been blessed with relationships. And looks, of course.

On that note, may your 2011 be delightful! With love,
Duane, Barb, Josh, Mere, Avery, Sasha (yes, she’s still here—Avery thinks she has a very hairy older sister), Greg, Sarah, Kate and Elia.